PineShoreStudio/Paintings by Helen Harris

Today an unexpected opportunity came my way......and I didn't take it. I think I've finally have reached that point in identifying just what it is that I want, need, to do, to be. I've worked at many jobs, for many reasons. I did my best to keep focusing and refocusing on my end goal. Life ...as it will do..often got in the way. It did again ,but this time it is enabling me to get exactly what I've desired. I am at home caring for my father but I am also able to use the hours left in a day to paint. I feel I've been making choices all along to be prepared for this day. Now, facing it , can I seize it? I hesitated at the thought of getting sidetracked ,again, by another job even if it seemed to be an interesting opportunity. That is no way to embark on something new. I could feel the energy drain right out of me and it returned when I turned down the offer. I may revisit this offer in the future but right now......brush in hand, I paint.

I'm having one of "those" days. You know, the kind that you try to convince yourself that all is well with the work you've just spent time doing. Something isn't quite right. You need that pay check, you need to make that deadline and catch the last mailing of the day...but. Do you give yourself some slack? Let this one, not -so -great , piece through? Is the critic in your head being overly obnoxious or is it the fear of regret once it is out for all to see? Hmm. ..good enough? If you have to ask....then it's not. Trash it. Keep working. That's the difference between amateur and professional.The best is yet to come. It's just a brush stroke away! Then tell that critic,"I told you so!" and smile.

It was my intention to return to the basics of drawing during this new year . I just didn't realize that the need would be one of solace rather than discipline The last few days caring for my father has been discouraging. Concentrating on painting has taken a back seat to meeting his needs. Mindlessly staring at television while Dad drifts off to sleep got old pretty fast. Working in my studio while he was sitting up and dozing proved dangerous when he would suddenly awaken and come looking for me or start to wander. My solution was to grab an old sketch book and doodle while sitting with him as he fell asleep. I've never been a fan of sketch books. I've always felt pretentious using one, self conscious in committing line to paper, usually opting for a scrap of paper instead. This time when I picked up a sketch book, what was to be a matter of convenience is actually becoming a journal of comfort. It is the rhythms of lights and darks , the strength of a solid composition

1st version & 2nd version Here I am trying to get back to my former schedule and prolific work and WHAM! my art representiative sends back 3 paintings for revision. This an arrangement we do have if a painting is not selling after a long time. Some artists may bristle at this. I came from a commercial arts background and revisions were the "norm" when dealing with a client.I feel it is the same in this case. My objective is to make the sale for myself, for my rep. A second look is not a bad thing .In most cases, I can improve a painting with a little tweak here and there. Some times ...not! That's why I've shown the two success. The third piece has been trashed and a new one went out in it's place. I learned a very important lesson long ago from my anatomy drawing professor. After drawing what I believed was the best possible figure ,he promptly took charcoal in hand and slashed left and right ,up and down with corrections. My in take of breath was audible an

So ,despite my best attempts at trying to keep the status quo in my daily business routines, living with my 90 year old Dad is like Alice falling into the rabbit hole with the Mad Hatter! This has been an experience unlike any other. Has it affected my work? You bet! It has thrown me back to past habits of working around the schedules that I had years ago while raising three children. Interruptions, daily crisis, questions and doubts, balanced by moments of success , improvement and growth. It has been an emotional rollercoaster that it is showing up in my work. My art rep received new work in January. I am exhibiting in a new show at The Ocean County Artist Guild,Island Heights NJ. Feb.3-26.and.... I've suddenly hit a wall. Now I need to take a deep breath,refocus and allow myself a moment of rest. But most importantly to acknowledge that it is ok to do so. My natural work habits will resurface as crisis' diminish. Sun Kissed: framed,$295. currently on exhibit at the Ocean Co